Handling Custody and Co-Parenting in a High-Conflict Case

Navigating custody and co-parenting is difficult under the best circumstances—but when you're caught in a highly-contested family law case, the challenges can feel overwhelming. In Missouri, the courts prioritize the best interests of the child, but achieving a stable, workable arrangement during an emotional legal battle can be complicated. If you’re currently facing this situation, here’s what you need to know—and some practical tips to help you move forward.

Understand How Missouri Courts Approach Custody

“There shall be a rebuttable presumption that an award of equal or approximately equal parenting time to each parent is in the best interests of the child.” Sect. 452.375 RSMo. 

When it comes to child custody in Missouri, the courts do not automatically favor one parent over the other. Instead, they examine several key factors to determine what arrangement is in the child’s best interests, including:

  • Each parent’s willingness to encourage a healthy relationship between the child and the other parent

  • The child’s needs and the parents’ ability to meet them

  • The mental and physical health of both parents

  • The child’s relationship with siblings, parents, and others who impact their life

  • The child’s wishes (especially if the child is older and mature enough to express a preference)

Knowing these standards can help you approach your case more strategically—and make decisions that strengthen your position.

Prioritize Documentation and Effective Communication

In a high-conflict custody case, documentation can be your best friend. Keep detailed records of:

  • Communication between you and your co-parent (texts, emails, etc.)

  • Any incidents that impact your child’s safety or emotional well-being

  • Missed visits, late pick-ups, or other parenting plan violations

When communicating with your co-parent, always assume that anything you say could end up in front of a judge. Stay polite, stick to the facts, and avoid engaging in emotional arguments.

Using co-parenting apps like OurFamilyWizard, AppClose or TalkingParents can help streamline communication while creating a neutral, court-admissible record.

Protect Your Child's Emotional Health During the Custody Battle

In the midst of legal battles, it’s easy to overlook how much stress children absorb. Missouri judges notice when a parent protects their child from conflict—and when a parent involves a child in adult disputes.

To help your child during this time:

  • Avoid discussing the case in front of them

  • Refrain from speaking negatively about the other parent

  • Support your child’s right to have a loving relationship with both parents

If necessary, consider involving a child therapist who can provide neutral, professional support for your child during this transition. If needed, a child therapist can offer testimony that supports your custody case, if appropriate.

Comply With Temporary Custody Orders

During a pending custody case, the court may issue temporary orders setting out how custody, visitation, and child support will work until a final judgment is entered. Treat these orders seriously. Violating a temporary order can damage your credibility and hurt your case in the long run.

Even if the temporary arrangement feels unfair, following it to the letter shows that you respect the court’s authority and are capable of prioritizing your child’s stability.

Hire an Experienced Missouri Family Law Attorney

If you're dealing with a high-conflict custody case, you shouldn't go it alone. An experienced Missouri custody lawyer can:

  • Guide you through the legal process

  • Help you avoid common mistakes

  • Advocate effectively for you and your child’s best interests in court

At Lotspeich Law, we understand how stressful and complex contested custody battles can be. Our family law team is committed to providing strong, compassionate representation to protect what matters most: your relationship with your child.

Final Thoughts

A highly-contested custody case in Missouri requires not just emotional strength—but a smart, legally sound strategy. Focus on your child's best interests, stay calm and professional, and work closely with a trusted Missouri family law attorney to protect your rights and your future.

If you're facing a difficult custody battle, contact Lotspeich Law today to schedule a consultation with an experienced Missouri custody lawyer. We're here to fight for you—and your family.

Next
Next

How to Prepare for Your Family Law Trial